@ The rOaD he WaLkS @

The road is lonely,
Dark & fearsome...
He walks in woe,
beside him a dark figure lurks....
Is it his past or the shadows of his future?


The rustling of the leaves,
The beam of the moon,
The whispering of the crickets,
Amongst all this the Zephyr,
Carrying his wounded soul...
So that it may mend his shattered heart....but why?
To be hurt again....


*Laughs*


The Withered pages of a Book,
He once held close to his heart...
Looked upon by many,
Followed by a few,
" The Book Of L O V E "


It brings him nostalgic memories,
It brings him blissful pain,
It brings him forgotten faces,
It brings him promised words,
A mirror of his past....



The Road he walks,
is lonely, Dark & Fearsome...

Though the wrinkle on his face...
Says an entirely different story to the world!


*Smiles*
*Closes Book*

Life w/o Love

*Bells from a distant horizon*.....

*Echoes from a deceptive past*.....

*Tears from a fallen angel*.....

*Pains from a ghastly soul*.....


Life = Canvas with a multitude of colours
Life = A book written by my maker
Life = Every moment that takes my breath away

**Smiles**

I wish not to get hurt,
So I hide the colours of love,
My canvas misses the shades I once trusted,
My brush fails me because my heart trust those colours no more.



I wish not to get hurt,
So I skip the pages of love,
I flip the pages so fast that i burn the words,
But, it leaves my soul free.



I wish not to get hurt,
So I hold my breath at the sight of love,
I hold my breath for so long that i lose the sense of it,
They say we have 5 senses but I have learned to live with none.



In all this i have no hatred for love.
But the concept of love to me, is different.

My canvas, my page and my breath all miss that word.......L-O-V-E

**Sighs**

My ride of broken dreams!

I close my eyes and look within,
An unknown pain both bitter & sweet,
I try to keep my heart at reach,
Alas! my heart dances to an unknown tune.


I smile at fate,
For my heart knows not what lies beyond,
I wish that i could foresee things,
Alas! my fate lies in an unknown hand.


I take a sigh,
a relief, a cry,
Wash away all that my heart tempts for,
Alas! my heart dances to an unknown tune.


A tune of despair,
A tune of hope,
A tune of pain,
A tune of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE!!

Oh me and my ride of broken dreams......

*laughs*

Waiting....

The whispers of the wind,

The touch of the rain,

The smell of lilies,

It all reminds me of you.



Every morning I wake up hoping to be with you,

I look within my heart and find a place to snuggle,

There, I find you waiting to greet me,

I wish that you were HERE to stay,

Alas! there is no way.



I wish for time to rewind itself,

I wish to watch the shadows of my past,

For I want to relive every moment I lost,

I wish to paint every colour that I forgot,

Alas! there is no way.




As the moon shines down and puts me to rest,

You come and take me away,

Holding my hand and dancing around,

I hold so tight that I don't want to let you go,

Alas! there is no way.




The whispers of the wind,

The touch of rain,

The smell of lilies,

It all reminds me of you.



I wait.....

From MY heaRt

My heart is mine...
And
Your heart is yours...

But then

Why does MY heart beat with every breath YOU take?

Why does MY heart smile with every step YOU make?

Why does MY heart cry when YOUR not around?

Why does my heart wait for the whispers of YOUR sound?

Why does MY heart skip a beat when OUR eyes meet?

Why does MY heart skip a beat with the mention of YOUR name?

Why does MY heart miss you when YOU say good-bye?

Why does MY heart miss you when YOUR not to stay?

Why does MY heart long just to be with YOU....

My heart is mine...
And
Your heart is yours...

But then

I love you and miss you....

@@@ FrIenDS @@@

I sit and hum a lonely tune,
I look around an empty dune.

I wonder why do I feel so low?
I wonder How could I bend so low?

when I was in pain no one bothered,
When I was in gain I was surrounded.

When they got hurt my heart would bleed,
when I got hurt they just flee'd.

Alas! it was all for what I called 'FRIENDS'
When time comes we know, who is our friend and who is our foe.

I sit and hum a lonely tune,
I look around an empty dune...... *sighs*

~*AngeL iN thE OcEan*~

She stares upon the lashing waves,
Flashes of life before her eyes.

The love she lost, her mothers tears, her fathers touch, her brothers kiss.....

Flashes of life unreeling itself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~


She calls upon the angle of death,
To take her through a journey unseen.

The feel of the wind, the taste of air, the feel of pain, the fear of loss.....

All for one last time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She lets herself go,
Free like a bird, flying without wings.

Where pain is not to be known,
She ends her life in the arms of her childhood love,
The colours she had painted her life with once.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*Smile*

She shuts her eyes,

*deep breath*

This is where it all started,
her first walk, her first date, her first kiss, her first love....
This is where it will all end....

Flashes of life, fear, happiness, anger, love, lust, despair...
The light at the end shines brightly.

Pain................Silence...................

Everything remains calm....

with only one sound....the lashing of waves.....

*wind*

We create it...MEMORIES!!

31st January 2010....Thunder, Lightning, RAIN...The smell of the soil, the sound of her sweet song, people running around just to find a place to hide from her...the rain

To me she is a sight I never want to miss...no matter how long i stare outside the window I can never be pacified...:)

*Dreams*

Well...I went to this place I once called heaven...my childhood playground. There was this huge tree which was our swing, slide, tunnel, pretend kitchen....everything. We would sit on her huge branches and talk for hours, play around her, hide around her over grown trunk, fall into her lap....we created something we didn't even realize...MEMORIES!!!

I go back in time just to get a glimpse of my time spent in India...my childhood...my past...Cochin

My dad would take my brother and me out in the rain wrapped in nothing but a thin cotton towel...we would dance and jump around in the rain...hoping that it would never end...my mom would call us back in fearing that we would fall sick...I miss all those little things yet, so precious moments that I spent.

WWF with my brother...*LOL*...sometime

s we would wrestle as if we were into the real stuff...Owen Hart (RIP), Bret Hart, The undertaker, Diesel, Razor Ramon....Oh man! all these were characters we used to enact...probably we were more real than them... *winks*

My brother was my best friend...we would discuss anything - no secrets as such...sometimes I sit and wonder if time could be got back...Alas! time is never refundable...time goes by, we grow up...I think I would prefer to remain a child at least I could relive those precious moments...may be I would try and correct a few things so that it would be better..

And would like to hold on to my best friend...MY BROTHER...:)

We all look back into our past...its human nature...some of us wish we could undo things...some wish we could redo & some well, wish it to remain the same...irrespective of whatever we wish our past is gone...just like time...we can't get it back...but, our past makes us who and what we are today and in the future...

Today,tomorrow and the following days too will be a memory soon....remember we create memories...this article i wrote with only one person in mind...who i miss a lot and who i never want to lose...

I LOVE YOU GORDON...always have and always will....miss you

P.S: I would not have put this picture...but the pic is soooo funny look at our mouth...*LOL*

The TakeR of sOuLs

I walk across the deserted land in search of dreams I once called my own...
shattered to a thousand pieces...in which i see a reflection...my own..

The winds of destiny push me afar...
Alas! I'm only a traveler in time...
The clock of fate ticks against my broken heart...
I seek a place to hide this pain.

There at a distance I see him come...
his black cloak flows sweeping away my pain...
in one hand he carried an hour glass...
in the other a Scythe.

He looks at my broken soul and whispers...
'Your time has come...'
he places the hour glass in my hand...
I look at it to see that the top part is bare and the bottom part full.

I smile...for this is the last time I will know worldly pain...
he has come to take my soul...
Ah! I have waited for thee...
I will reap as I have sown.

Darkness imprisons me!

The UNknown

The unknown places that I've been,
The unknown faces that I've seen.

The unknown hearts that I've touched,
The unknown hearts that I've crushed.

The unknown voices that I've heard,
The unknown whispers that I've feared.

The unknown dreams that I've dreamt,
The unknown time that I've spent.

The unknown shadows that I've followed,
The unknown souls that I've hollowed.

The unknown tears that I've shed,
The unknown mouths that I've fed.

The unknown truth that I seek,
The unknown fears that make me weak.

The unknown....*sighs*....remains inside of me!
The unknown of unknowns.

"Good-Bye"

There I was, standing at the airport....
Why is 'Good-bye' so hard to say?

My heart couldn't stop saying 'she'll be back'....she ran up to me after her baggage check-in..

I stared at her....those beautiful curls entwined against one another...her eyes were filled with happiness (she was going back home to her family) yet, I could see that there was something they wanted to tell me...

Everything about her is what I always wanted...and I wanted it for a life time...a life time of love which is so PRECIOUS...

The time came to say good-bye...tears filled my eyes as I watched her walk away...far away...and even farther....till only nothing but her warm kiss remains....Now I had to wait for her....

It seemed like ages though only a few hours had passed...TRING_TRING....there it was...'Oh legs run...RUN'..."hello"...Ah! it was that lovely voice....we talked for hours....day and night I would just wait for her to call me....

Days went by and time flew...her calls were less and somehow my head & heart were having constant battles....its become a month now with no calls at all from her...I try to call and the number does not exist....I waited patiently....Oh God! where did I go wrong?...

Months went by.....'NO CALLS'....A year passed...one day as I was checking my mail box, a letter with a familiar handwriting got my attention....

WOW!!! it was her...I didn't know whether to cry or laugh...I opened the letter with trembling hands...my head was spinning...I could hear my heart pounding....butterflies in my stomach...it read....

" I LOVE YOU....BUT....GOOD-BYE"

Then it all came back to me....her eyes this is what they were trying to say....

"Good-bye"

Why is 'Good-bye' so hard to say?

With unanswered questions & hatred for LOVE...i remain...

Zeus

I feel in love the first time i saw you...
You came in and all my sadness went away...
You made me proud in every way possible...

When i was sad you knew exactly how to cheer me up...
You greeted me with a hug and a slurp...
You learned everything i taught you...without any complaints...
You welcomed all my friends like they were your own...

You changed my world Zeus...
Today i wish upon every star that you were next to me...

I still remember your reaction when you saw Snehin...
You couldn't wait to pounce on him...
Peeping through the window into our bed room just to have a glimpse of our new member...
Oh my! how i wish you were here...

People have made fun of us Zeus...
Mocked our bond...
They asked me 'how can you love an animal so much?'...
Only if they knew that you were the only one...through thick & thin...

I love you more and more everyday...
You are away from me and yet are inseparable...
My eyes get full everyday thinking how can i get you back....
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU....
If there was anything more i could say...

I remain...

Death

She lay there looking the way she did on her wedding day....
wrapped in a white dress made just for her...
i wondered if it was just me or is she really so pretty...

As I sat by her.. memories rushed back....
She was dancing the first time i saw her....
My heart was racing against time and i was sweating...
She didn't even notice me but, I wouldn't stop staring....
days went by and i kept my distance from her....
gradually we became friends...
Best friends....for life

All the time we spent together....
Kissing and cuddling...
sharing everything in our life....
fighting and laughing over the silliest things in life....
it has all been gifted to me...
I'm so proud to know that I'm the ONE...

Today she leaves me...for good...
If only i could get another lifetime with her by my side....
I would never stop saying 'I LOVE YOU'....
She leaves me today and that is a fact i have to accept and live with...

I smile everyday thanking God for the time i had with her....

A month has passed and i would like to complete my fathers diary...
Today he will lay next to mum...
the last words he said were...I LOVE YOU ANGEL....

A fathers tale...

Name - Robert...loved ones call me Bob...
Age - 32, single / Writer...
Dream - to save a life...
Ambition - spread a message...

She came into my life when she was five...
her tiny hands clinging onto mine...
her eyes where full of questions....
hope, anxiety, fear...a mixture of everything...
She got close to me..an inseparable part of my life...

She grew..bold and beautiful...
time had no limits...
at the blink of an eye...she was 18...
she flew high...she was everything a father could ask for...
she made me the proudest person ever...

One day she said 'Papa i wanna go in search of my dreams'...
I said nothing...I let her go...
I had expected nothing and given my all...
Isn't that what love is all about..'Letting go & giving your everything'...
She left and i felt abandoned...

Days became weeks...weeks became months...and months became years...

One pleasant morning...as i got back from my morning walk..
a very familiar smell was in my hall way...
I didn't want to jump into conclusions...so i waited
There she was...the most beautiful thing in my life...
My sweet Emily...all grown up...

She hugged me and kissed me on my forehead...
'Welcome back'...is all i could say...
I greeted her into our old home...
Her face lit up with the smell of baked muffins...
She ran to the kitchen and grabbed some...
mmmmmmm...is all i could hear...a smile was stamped on my face...

Suddenly, i heard a bell...
What was this...annoying sound...

I woke up to the alarm...Alas it was all a dream...
my heart broke into a thousand pieces...

the news on the radio killed me...

'There was a horrible accident at Edmond this morning. A young girl named Emily Robinson aged, 21 was found dead...'

I couldn't hear anything else after that...


Name - Robert
Age - 48,Single / writer
Dream - to meet Emily
Ambition - none

The above note was found next to the body of Mr. Robert. He committed suicide on the day his daughter passed away.

|Case closed.|

My comment:

'If you love something, Let it go.
If it comes back to you. It is yours.
Else it never was'

In this story i leave it to the readers....

Me

Oh my!!! *Deep breath* This is my first time on a blog....never had the courage to even think of starting one...but then a friend of mine gave me a push and my husband encouraged me that's when i decided to stop hiding...Okay let me start with 'who am I?'...

Well another average person who lives life with the hope that someday I'll be rich...*Pauses*

*Laughs Out Loud*

Nah!! I'm a person who is in search of one thing...the thing that's means a lot to me....'TRUTH'...
as a child I used to commit a lot of.. err ...lets say unwanted mess...I used to lie a lot, break every single rule, disturb my mom and dad, threaten my neighbors kids, hide guests shoes...you name it...my mom was fed up with me...she didn't know where did she go wrong.....in school my so called 'friends' termed me WEIRD....for them i was not normal...but can anyone define what normal is....beats me...

I wouldn't want to bore you with my childhood memories hence, i skip that part...hey wait i have to let my readers know this...the day i saw 'Tare Zamain par', that's when i saw my self in it...Ishan Avasthi...*smiles*

I was another Ishan...I had my own imagination....I would talk to walls, dogs, cows, sheep anything and everything...I had fairies in my sleep and dragons...animals could fly...pretty unicorns would be around...people thought that i was...let me not beat around the bush...'INSANE'...my loved ones termed me 'hyperactive child'....deep down i didn't know what to do or say....I just loved being my self....

As i look back in time i have nothing to hold close to my heart except a few memories,friends and all the pets that i have had....Today i have a child and he is junior me...*Laughs*...no complaints and no demands....i want him to be the way he is...

This is just an introduction about my self...crazy me and my stories....I'm not an entertainer but i will try to tell you my story in a very simple and brief way...I'm not much into poems but will definitely try...everything i write comes from my life experiences or from some who are close to me....the truth as i know is the most difficult thing to deal with hence, my search is never ending....

I would like to brief on the name given to this blog...the jewels are my experiences and the crown well, that would be my life...

Hope that in the coming days i will be able to bring a smile to a few faces....

*Smiles* *Winks*